Nostalgia and Old Albums

I am about to age myself...  Growing up in the '70s and '80s, my family lived in a Rancher-style home, which is not my personal preference.  It is one level with a basement, although ours also had a carport.  Come to think of it, do they even make houses with carports anymore?  It's basically an overhang that extends from your house but the sides are not enclosed.  I much prefer my current two-car garage that provides protection from all of the elements.  The entrance from the carport led to the kitchen where you turned left to go into the dining room.  It was an open design that then led you into the living room and then the bedrooms, which were at the far side of the house in a semi-circle.  Therefore, all of the bedrooms were in close proximity, allowing me to clearly hear the music coming from my brother's room across the hallway. 

As my brother was over four years older, our musical tastes were quite different.  While I was a preteen in the early '80s and listening to disco, K-tel records and pop music on B104, my brother was a full-blown teenager.  He was an avid listener of 98 Rock, the most popular mainstream rock radio station in Baltimore even to this day.  At that time, it was typical to buy albums and spend a lot of time in your room listening to music.  I remember seeing certain albums in constant rotation in my brother's room.  Artists included Peter Frampton (what dude growing up in that time didn't own Frampton Comes Alive?), AC/DC, Van Halen, DIO, etc.  However, as Rush was his favorite band, those were the albums played on repeat.  I couldn't help but pick up the more radio-friendly tunes like Tom Sawyer, Limelight, Freewill, Spirit of Radio and Red Barchetta.  Unfortunately, while I wasn't a fan of the instrumentals like YYZ, my brother loved them. 

Starting around 1983, I became obsessed with Duran Duran.  I had heard songs here and there on the radio but the tune that really solidified me as a Duranie was The Reflex.  It would've been impossible not to have seen their many videos on MTV, particularly those filmed in exotic locations such as Antigua and Sri Lanka.   The video for The Reflex is a live performance of the single version, which I preferred over the album version.  Since I could not get enough of this song, I bought the dance version and played it over and over and over again,  In case you're not familiar, it starts out with several "da na na na"s followed by "the reflex".  After the first verse, there are a lot of "why-y-y-y-y"s and "fle-fle-fle-fle-flex"s.  I consider it no small miracle that I am alive today since I'm sure this drove my parents crazy.  Oh and as an aside, I still think John Taylor (the bass player) is a hottie even today.  

Fast forward to 2016 when I met my husband.  His favorite band is, you guessed it, Rush.  Over the years, I'd become a true fan myself, even though I still don't care for the mostly instrumental tunes.  He wasn't the first drummer I knew that told me that they actually learned to drum solely by listening to Neil Peart and those Rush albums.  I was impressed but did say some prayers that this new guy I'd met was actually a good drummer, as I consider Neil Peart to be the best.  Fast forward to the present and not only did my husband prove just how talented he is but I'm lucky to get to watch him play Rush (and other classic rock) with his band on the regular.  On Friday, January 10th, 2020, along with the rest of the world, we were greatly shocked and saddened by the news of Neil Peart's passing on January 7, 2020.  He was a private man and had hidden his treatment of brain cancer for over three years.  As I would surely mourn the passing of any of my Duran Duran members, my husband mourned the death of his idol. 

A few days later, I noticed that AXS television was airing a special on the Classic Albums of Rush-2112 and Moving Pictures.  I set the DVR and we arranged to watch it the following Friday night after the kids had gone back to their other respective parents.  It was a cold night so we lit a fire and watched the one-hour program, where not only did they discuss the two albums mentioned but actually went back to the formation and evolution of the band over the years.  It was fascinating to hear their influences and the origination of their lyrics and music.  The individual interviews with each of the three members of Rush added personal touches and humor.  Some of their music was complex, which led me to explain to my husband that I preferred the more radio-friendly tunes as they were easier to pick up the words.  The band recalled that on the album 2112, they were actually telling a science-fiction story that spanned throughout the songs on the first side.  I am not one for "theme" albums; however after hearing them explain it song by song, I was now able to fully appreciate them.  

This started us reminiscing about what it was like to grow up in the 1970s and 1980s.  Wow, who can actually believe that these were four to five decades ago now?  Some of our fondest memories are those simple times, alone in our room with huge headphones covering our ears so we could immerse ourselves in the music.  Without any interruption, you could hear every word, every strum of a guitar chord and the rhythm of the bass and drums working together.  

We then ventured down to the basement to retrieve our old albums.  Although we also had varied musical tastes at the time, it was fun to sit together and share old memories of when we got the albums, which were our favorites and the tours where we were able to see the bands play their music live.  

Fast forward to 2021 and things have changed dramatically.  Stereos have disappeared for the most part and all that is left are tiny EarPods plugged into phones.  What's worse is that very few are actually just listening to music anymore without also multi-tasking.  (I am guilty of this.)  You're listening while doing many other things, like checking email, responding to a text, answering a call and falling down the slippery slope that is social media.  While my husband and I shared our cherished memories of those years, it was somewhat bittersweet as we realized that our children will probably never share some of the more simple joys in life.  

Now's your turn to share your favorite albums!

Thank You Rachel Hollis

I believe it was May, 2018 and I had just returned from the annual conference held by a company that I joined as a part-time side hustle.  Two words were spreading like wildfire.  Rachel Hollis.  I'd never heard of her but apparently her new book Girl, Wash Your Face was a New York Times Bestseller.  It was deemed a must-read for anyone in our business.  So, I ordered this book with the wet girl next to a spouting fire hydrant on the cover.

While impatiently awaiting the arrival of said book, I immersed myself in everything Rachel Hollis.  She had a website called The Chic Site, which had countless blog/posts, videos and recipes.  (This has now transitioned to www.msrachelhollis.com so head on over there if you're curious.)  However, what really drew me in was her daily morning show on Facebook.  At the time, she lived in Los Angeles with her husband Dave and their four children (or as they say, "It's like 1,000 kids").   This medium was perfect since you could watch a Live video of her talking for about 20-30 minutes or view it at a later time.

Rachel is THE REAL DEAL.  Straight-forward, authentic, relatable, smart and funny.  Obviously, there was a lot of discussion about the book, which was great since I got invaluable insights before I was able to read it.  By the way, when you read her book, it's written just like you're sitting down with a girlfriend.  She's raw and allowed herself to be extremely vulnerable while revealing some embarrassing moments.  All so we can realize that we are not alone, that we can also overcome our fears and obstacles.

She rarely wore makeup, which I found endearing because in this age of perceived perfection, who would go on a Livestream in front of thousands of people with no makeup?  Someone who wants you to show up as yourself.  Someone who doesn't have time for makeup when she's dealing with getting four kids off to school, before or after her morning workout.  Someone who's trying to change the landscape of this warped thinking that in order to be beautiful you have to change how you look.

Some of you may have heard of her when she broke the internet in March, 2015.  She'd posted a bikini pic on a beach while on vacation in Cancun, showing what real women look like after they've carried and birthed three children.  I think we've all been there.  We buy a bathing suit or a bikini to cover the stretch marks, permanent belly flab or saggy belly button. We're embarrassed to not look perfect, as we think "everyone" else does with their flat, toned abs.  But honestly, what do we know about those women?  Have they had children?  Have they had cosmetic surgery to cover up their imperfections?  Do they starve themselves or work out four hours/day?  And who are these people anyway?  Do we care what they think?  One of Rachel's biggest battles was other people's opinions, which she discusses in both books. However, Rachel's entire point with that post was to redirect our thinking to the positive.  She doesn't want us to body-shame.  She wants us to proudly show off the amazing miracle that our bodies carried and birthed our babies!

There were plenty of YouTube videos as well as her podcast, which has morphed from the Dais podcast to Rise to now just her name.  On the podcast, she speaks on a topic herself or interviews experts to help you with your small business or just to improve your life.  The more I learned, watched and listened, the more I admired our girl Rach.  I'm not taking liberties here, as my husband believes...she actually refers to herself as "your pal Rach".  You start to feel like she knows you and is part of your inner circle.  She's your supporter, your ally, your friend, your coach, your mentor!  It's no surprise that she has a fiercely loyal tribe, primarily of women like myself, but also men.

I developed what may have been a slight obsession.  I devoured every bit of her content that I could.  My prior heavy influences were Tony Robbins and Oprah, who ironically, Rachel herself also states are her heroes.  When someone speaks into your soul, you find yourself inspired and excited to do better, be better and improve every day.  Also, around mid-2018, Rachel and Dave packed up their family and moved to Austin, Texas.  Dave was left his job at Disney to work with Rachel at the Hollis Company and they also started the Rise Together podcast.  (More on this later.)

It only made sense that in January 2019 when her Rise Women's Conference in Minnesota was announced, I was determined to go.  Much to my dismay, it sold out in about 20 minutes.  Frankly, they were shocked that it had sold out this quickly given their prior conference attendance.  I was heartbroken but within hours, a second event was announced.  They were going to hold the same conference in Dallas and the venue would hold over twice the amount of people.   This is typical of what Rachel does for her tribe.  She feels she was put on this Earth to give back and she goes to any lengths to do so.

On my birthday in March, 2019, Rachel released Girl, Stop Apologizing, her much-anticipated follow up book to her New York Times bestseller.  This book, focused on how accomplish your goals, was a hit.  It landed on the New York Times bestseller list immediately and both books remained on it for many weeks.  You may have heard of the Start Today Journal, which is Rachel's daily practice where she writes down five things she's grateful for and then her dreams.  She formally developed the journal after many requests, but if you listen to Episode 72 of her podcast, she breaks down how you can do it in your own notebook.  As she says, the important thing is to do the practice, not sell you the journal.

So, in mid-July 2019, I flew to Dallas for the three day Rise conference.  I won't give out too many details as I feel this was such a life-changing event that every women should experience at least once.  Just know that this 5'2" powerhouse will blow you away.  While she does the majority of the speaking, she also has amazing guest speakers that will have you writing so fast you will wish you had a stenographer.  The nuggets of wisdom are endless, for anyone in business and/or those who are just looking to be happier with themselves and achieve their dreams.  You will be held accountable for being present, energized and kind.  Go alone, bring a friend, bring your daughter or bring your Mom but no matter what, you will leave with the knowledge that there are a whole tribe of Rise sisters in your corner.  I went alone and was astounded at the friendliness of the Hollis Co. employees as they went above and beyond to make you feel welcome and accommodated.  Lastly, there is a live DJ and dancing, so wear your comfy clothes and tennis shoes.

In early 2020, Rachel was invited by OPRAH to speak on her stage during the 2020 Weight Watchers Vision Tour.  OPRAH.  Yes, she deserves her name in all caps, always.  She flew to NYC to give a 20 minute motivational presentation before the Michelle Obama interview.  I say presentation because Rachel doesn't just speak, she interacts and wants your feedback.  I was so happy for her, both when announced and when she showed videos of her interaction with Oprah.  I was ecstatic to hear that Oprah is as gracious as I've always imagined.  Not long after, she had a flare up of her neuralgia, which has previously exhibited itself as Bell's palsy.  She showed a picture on Instagram of one of those episodes, which is extremely vulnerable since it once again shows that she's real and just like us...even after speaking on OPRAH's stage.

A bombshell dropped in late May, 2020.  Rachel and Dave announced that they were separating and getting a divorce after 20 years together. I believe her entire tribe was at least temporarily shocked and heartbroken.  Selfishly, the community was saddened because we'd grown to adore Rachel and Dave as a couple.  They were best friends and appeared to have it all together with date nights and raising their kids with great values and empowerment.  They had it all so why didn't or couldn't it work?  A lot of us held out hope that this was not final but alas, it is.  While so many have judged and spoken negatively, what gives them the right?  After all, Rachel (and Dave for that matter) have graciously given countless hours of free information on how to better ourselves and achieve our dreams.  What a lot of people forgot, including myself for a moment, is that they are HUMAN.  People break up because it's just not working anymore, so why should they not be able to move on and be happy if that is their decision?  Certainly, it took courage to make that decision in private but even more to share it with the public.  

Last, but certainly not least is how Rachel describes her community.  "They don't act the same, look the same, believe the same..."  While she and Dave are no longer together, they both practice radical acceptance and their actions and friendships support this at every turn.  What could be more uplifting and encouraging in times like these?  Although, I wish she'd been around 20 years ago, I'm excited that she's revolutionizing personal development by inspiring everyone, including our children, to believe that we are Made for More.  So, if you want to feel like you belong to a community, be motivated or just need a laugh, check out my girl Rach and let me know what you think.

Intro and Life Lesson #1

Hello and welcome to my blog!  My name is Christine Hansen and I am an aspiring writer.  I live in the suburbs of Baltimore, Maryland with my husband, Chris and our three children.  I have a son from a prior marriage and he has two daughters from his so we do not have any children together.  We've been pretty much inseparable since we met just over 4.5 years ago and we'll celebrate our one year anniversary in April of 2021.

I've lived here my entire life and in fact, live just slightly over two miles from my childhood home.  Ironically, we live just over 3 miles from where Chris grew up.  It was just me and my brother, who is almost 5 years older, and the closest thing to a pet that my parents allowed was goldfish.  Did I mention that I'm almost 50 years old?  However, this writing thing is not at all new to me.  I've always loved the English language, any English or writing courses and even tried my hand at short stories when I was very young.  Granted, I don't recall finishing most of them but I enjoyed the process nonetheless.  I've always been a voracious reader so that does seem to lend a hand to creating writers as well.  I really should have pursued writing much earlier in life, but back in the late 80s, you either went to college or you got a job.  Working was not new to me since I'd started early, working as a babysitter, around the age of 12.   There was also that defining and shocking moment when my parents told me that they weren't sending me to college.  They'd not revealed this to me before but strangely acted as though I should not have been surprised.  I recently ran across my high school transcript and it was excellent.  I'm sure any college would have been happy to have me but practicality won out and without a significant amount of money from my parents, I ruled out attending college.  The last thing I wanted was to pay off college loans for the rest of my life.  Quite frankly, the option of taking out a loan wasn't even mentioned.  It was a time when I felt pressured to redirect myself to a new career, which sadly wasn't writing.

Okay, so my parents had saved a VERY small amount of money, just not nearly enough to go to college.  Location, location, location...the #1 rule of real estate.  Ironically, this is what led me to go into real estate.  My parents' property was divided into two plots and just behind our house lived their very good friends, John and Brenda.  Even prior to moving with them to this property, they had spent a lot of time at our house.  Both John and Brenda were realtors with Coldwell Banker and seemed to do very well.  After all, it enabled them to move out of their townhouse with their two kids and build a nice home.  It seemed like a cool idea to sell houses and luckily, this small amount of money would fund the education, testing and early costs of becoming a real estate agent.  You should be aware that I was 19 years old.  This would not be the only naive decision I would make at a young age.  I should mention that my best friend's Mom also worked for Coldwell Banker, so it seemed natural to attend their classes.  Honestly, I was bored with the minutia of what I was learning but figured it would be much more fun when applied.  Plus, I'd get to see a lot of neat houses and doesn't everyone love going into different houses?  I managed to pass the course test and then spent many hours studying for the state and national portions of the Real Estate Exam.  I PASSED!  The fun would start now, right?

Back in 1990, when I got my real estate Salesperson license, the internet is not what we have now.  You couldn't just browse listings online for free.  You needed a brokerage to connect to the Multiple Listing System, or MLS.  In order to access it, you had to pay fees to MLS on a regular basis.  Additionally, you had to pay brokerage fees (to allow you the use of their name and access to clients), the annual fee to the National Association for Realtors, continuing education and miscellaneous marketing costs.  My small "fund" was depleting quickly at this point so I was hoping that I would sell a house pretty soon in order to break even or come out ahead.  Let me return your attention to my age of 19.  I'd like to think that I was just overly confident, but truly I was ignorant to the ways of the world at this point.  You know, it was probably the same part of me that thought I knew everything and thought my parents knew nothing just a few short years earlier.  This was the first lesson that really smacked me across the face.  While I was pleasant and looked the part, who in their right mind would sign a contract with someone with no experience?  It became obvious that age and wisdom needed to go hand in hand in order to gain the trust of your clients.  The other damning evidence that this was not my chosen career path was the reality of how familiar you needed to be with a math calculator.  Yes, that's right...a calculator.  You had to, at a moment's notice, whip out this calculator that would magically determine how much you could afford, at which interest rate, with a certain down payment and then the amount of your monthly payment.  I am sure this is not the case in 2020.  There has to be an "app for that", one which magically does it all without you worrying about missing a number or a step in the process.  At the time, given that I detested math, this was the final nail in the real estate coffin.

After about a year or less, I decided to stop the financial bleeding and look for a full-time job with benefits.  I'd kept my paying job at Kmart but there were no benefits and you basically stood on your feet all day.  I'd grown up watching my Mom work at an office job so that seemed like the thing to do, particularly given my avid typing skills.  

I did maintain my real estate license for several years by paying the renewal fees) but eventually let it lapse.  I felt sad to let it go, given that I still count that as a huge accomplishment, especially considering my age.  No matter what, I gained a lot of experience, especially in how the world works.  My decisions going forward would soon provide many more opportunities to gain even more of this real-life experience.

Please feel free to share your comments or questions about this post.  What was your first real-life lesson?